(Make sure to check out TV Envy’s Programming Schedule.)

• 10 Things I Hate About You (ABC Family, 8pm):  “While on suspension, Kat sneaks into school to take a test.” Kids these days—if they’re not itching to text, they’re dying to take tests.
• 24 (FOX, 9pm):  “Taylor gives Jack a crucial assignment.” His mission: Safely deliver Conan O’Brien to FOX before times runs out.
• Kell on Earth (Bravo, 10pm):  “The staffers throw a birthday party for Kell.” The interns will be saddled with perfecting the seating arrangements for musical chairs.

• Little Chocolatiers (TLC, 10pm):  “Steve and Katie combine chocolate and beer in an attempt to create new flavor combinations.” Malt balls made from malt liquor = one Whopper of an Easter basket.
• The Michael Vick Project (BET, 10pm):  “Michael contributes to a program designed to help recently released inmates reenter society.” With the right casting agent, a reality show series could just be a phone call away.
• Little Miss Perfect (We, 10pm):  “An enthusiastic but inexperienced girl receives support from her motorcycle-riding mother.” There’s no doubt the black leather helped get her name out there.

• It’s the Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown (ABC, 8pm):  “Snoopy helps Woodstock upgrade from a nest to a mod new birdhouse.” Thanks to the $6500 home buyer tax credit, he was able to double his previous square footage.
• America’s Next Top Model (CW, 8pm):  “The models pose as vampires in a bloody bathtub at the photo shoot. Back at the loft, two girls get into a screaming match.” There will be blood. Oh yes… there will be blood.
• Ugly Betty (ABC, 10pm):  “Amanda and Hilda join Betty on a trip to Fashion Week in London, where Betty reconnects with Christina (Ashley Jensen) and has a chance encounter with Gio (Freddy Rodriguez).” True friends just don’t come back around when the braces come off.

• FlashForward (ABC, 8pm:  “Demetri, Janis, Simon and Vogel investigate the mysterious tower in Somalia and meet someone who witnessed a blackout in 1991.” Ooh, ooh—I’ve blacked out too! Oh - they probably mean something else.
• Grey’s Anatomy (ABC, 9pm):  “Alex’s brother arrives with a hernia in need of repair and without insurance to pay for it.” Under President Obama‘s new plan, Seattle Grace will be required to help every long lost relative that makes their way onto the show.
• LA Ink (TLC, 10pm):  “It’s a first for Kat when she s asked to tattoo prosthetic limbs for two amputees.” She’s handled fake parts before, just not ones that could be removed.

• Wife Swap (ABC, 8pm):  Season premiere. “A wife with three children and 14 plastic dolls called reborn babies swaps with a strict family that employ their three boys at the family coffee shop and hot-dog stand.” The experiment resulted in a much needed vacation for the three boys and employment opportunities for the reborn babies.
• Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution (ABC, 9pm):  “Jamie gets a chance to cook at Huntington High School, and finds a group of motivated students who are on board with his initiative.” They registered their votes by texting “Whateva.”
• American Loggers (Discovery, 10pm):  “Tempers flare between Bonecrusher and Jeff.” Snap judgment decision: I’m going with “Bonecrusher” for the win.

• Your Kid Ate What? (TLC, 8pm):  “Doctors operate on a 1-year-old with a sticker lodged in her throat.” They really shouldn’t make those scratch-and-sniffs so darn appealing.
• Undercover Boss (CBS, 9pm):  “Roto-Rooter president Rick L. Arquilla works undercover at his company.” He wants to sort out the crap for himself.
• Kirstie Alley’s Big Life (A&E, 10:30pm):  “The staff members complain about their workload, so Kirstie decides to take over their tasks, but soon finds that the jobs are more demanding than she realized.” “Make Kirstie Alley relevant” and “Recruit fans of Kirstie” sounded much easier on paper.