CBS announced that it will begin putting its eye logo and program logos on 35 million eggs this fall through a campaign called “egg-vertising.” Among the phrases that CBS plans to include on the eggs: “CSI: Crack the case on CBS,” “The Amazing Race: Scramble to Win on CBS,” and “Shark: Hard-Boiled Drama,” as well as “Shelling Out Laughs,” “Funny Side Up,” and “The Class: New Grade-A CBS Comedy.” Says George Schweitzer, president of the CBS marketing group, “We’ve gone through every possible sad takeoff on shelling and scrambling and frying. It’s a great way to reach people in an unexpected form.”

Um… yeah. I’m not sure how well egg messages are going to translate to viewership. Seeing a message from CBS as I crack open my breakfast isn’t eggs-actly (ugh, I know) going to motivate me to watch their programs. The eggs with the laser imprinted messages will hit grocery shelves in September and October.