Treat Your Inner Jerk to the TV Poltergeist

Want to piss off your friends with more than just your abrasive personality and obnoxious hygiene habits or complete lack thereof?  Yes, it is rude to clip your toenails in someone else’s living room, genius; what are you, five?  If you feel the need to step up your toxicity—to neutron bomb your friendships, poisoning the landscape for decades to come and leaving behind a barren landscape of people hating the very mention of your name in your wake—then look no further: the TV Poltergeist is the gadget for you.  The TV Poltergeist is a battery-powered and easily hide-able palm-sized piece of hardware with a tiny, flexible LED that you can point towards the TV of your intended victim.  Once you turn it on the TVP will randomly emit a signal via the LED and shut your future ex-friend’s TV off.  Works on just about any TV—CRT, Plasma, LCD—just not your Gramma’s 30 year-old knob-operated Zenith, though if you pull this stunt on your Gramma a) you’re an a$$ and b) expect to get written out of the will and hit with a cane.  That woman lived through 5 wars and walked 40 miles to kindergarten everyday.  Show some respect!

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